1+1+1: Worries are Stories
“There were many terrible things in my life and most of them never happened.” —Michel de Montaigne
I have a memory from when I was 16, where a friend of my parent’s told me that he thought out of all the people he knew, I’d be the last to get an ulcer. Was this a compliment? I wasn’t sure. I think he was telling me that he saw me as care-free. Which I was. I also happened to be responsibility-free, bill-free, and having-a-clue-free. It was easier then.
Part of growing up, it seems for many of us, means maturing into a blackbelt level worriers.
It’s hard to move into the future when the future feels like a threat.
There are many ways worry can keep us stuck—whether that’s stalling, projecting or catastrophizing—all of which are a form of storytelling.
We are narrative creatures after all and we can’t help but make stories. There are all kinds of stories about what might or might not happen; about what others might or might not be thinking about us; about an upcoming deadline, or a million other unknown, uncontrollable things.
Here’s a bit of good news for us expert level, high capacity worriers: both hope and worry require an act of the imagination.
If you have the capacity to worry you also have the ability to imagine something better.
Which means if you’re really good at worrying,
then you’re also really good at imagining,
which means you’re mega skilled in creativity,
which means you have enormous potential
to employ your future-making faculty called
the imagination, in all kinds of ways!
Worries are stories. You can assume the director’s seat or remote control at any point to determine what show is being screened. To do that isn't easy and it does take practice. It begins by bringing awareness to your worries and then offering a compassionate and creative context for these beliefs to be explored and shifted.
What’s the worry story I’m telling myself?
Is this story true?
Can I know for sure that it’s true?
Who would I be without this story?
Am I ready to trade this story in for another?
What’s the new story I could begin telling?
Quote
“There were many terrible things in my life and most of them never happened.”
—Michel de Montaigne
Question
Here’s a poem by 14th century poet Hafiz, comprised of a single question:
Now that all your worry has proved such an
unlucrative business,
Why not find a better job?
Poem
The Peace of Wild Things
When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.
—Wendell Berry
Thanks for reading,
Lance Odegard
unstucking.co
Hi there! 👋 My name’s Lance - I’m a writer, coach, and learning designer from Vancouver BC, Canada. In this publication, you’ll find a growing archive of resources for those looking for creativity fuel to keep moving and making. Thanks for stopping by.
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